“I’m just not one to air my dirty laundry.”
That’s what someone told me a little over a week ago in regards to my blog.
I had already had a…tough… day. It was my last day at my old job. And it was absolutely my time for that chapter of my life to end, but it’s tough to leave people who you spent 50+ hours a week with for the last 3 years. Just to put it out there, the first week at my new job was absolutely incredible. But this post isn’t about that.
Anyway, after this tough day someone said to me, they don’t know why I do this (write in my blog). It’s just me airing my dirty laundry which is not what they would expect for me to do.
And when I got in the car to go home, I lost it. I started questioning everything. I questioned leaving my job. I questioned working my side business. I questioned writing my blog. I questioned all of the things that have made me who I am today.
And I almost deleted my blog.
I almost deleted the thing that provides me therapy and happiness and relief from how I feel. I almost deleted the thing that provides OTHERS with the comfort that they are not alone.
And then I said NO. I said, THIS is the reason that I do this!
Now, I don’t want this to be taken the wrong way because ALL of these are terrible and I would never wish them on anyone. BUT if I were a person with chronic physical illness writing a blog, I would be celebrated. If I were a mom with a baby in the NICU writing a blog, I would be comforted. If I were a heart surgery patient sharing my treatment story writing a blog, I would be supported.
Why is me as a person with mental illness and sharing my daily battle, writing a blog airing my dirty laundry? THIS is the stigma I am FIGHTING DAILY to destroy. Physical illness and mental illness are BOTH illnesses. EVERY FREAKING PERSON FIGHTS THEIR OWN BATTLES. Don’t discount one persons over another just because you can physically see their wounds.
I’m done being sorry for my depression. I’m done being sorry for my anxiety. I’m done being sorry for sharing my story.
Don’t give in to the shit society tells you is “not appropriate”. You don’t know how many lives you can save by sharing YOUR story and YOUR struggle. Don’t give up. Let’s DESTROY this STIGMA TOGETHER.